Why Do Couples Fight About Money? The Most Common Arguments Revealed

forgive-yourself-for-cheating-mainIn poll after poll, you’ll find that the most common reason behind marital and couple disputes is money.

Kids, household chores, intimacy, jealousy and lack of communication are also common reasons that couples fight, but time after time it’s money and financial concerns that top the lists. 

Of course, it’s important to mention that all couples fight now and again, even those who have been together for decades believe it’s important to voice your opinions and differences, resolve them and never go to bed on an argument.

Sadly, it’s money that can put a huge strain on relationships, more than any of the other disputes mentioned above. What’s worked for me? Reach out to Creditfix if you and your partner need some debt advice. 

So, why do couples fight about money? Here we’ll check out the most common arguments. 

You spend too much money!”

It’s unlikely that you’ll both have the same spending habits, usually one of you is a little more careful with the purse strings while the other is often a little more flexible. These kinds of habits can lead to resentment and tension between couples, especially if one person believes the other is spending too much and the other disagrees and believes they’re being harassed. It’s important to speak to each other to iron out any differences. Go through your finances and your expenses and find out how much of the money is actually dispensable.

“You have so much debt!”

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Everyone has a debt of some kind and it’s not anything to be ashamed of. However, in some cases debt can be incredibly stressful, debilitating and harm relationships between partners and spouses. In some extreme cases, people hide the truth scale of their debt from their partners, but the best option is always to seek debt advice, help and communicate with your loved one.

“Your money goals are different from mine”

You want to save for a house, but your loved one wants to save for a car, or for the holiday of a lifetime. Disagreements over financial goals between couples are incredibly common, but it’s important to try and find common ground. Sit down and discuss what you both want and focus on your short and long-term goals. Remember, you’re a team!

“You’re keeping secrets from me!”

Many couples admit to hiding money from their spouse. Whether it’s in a secret bank account that they can do with what they wish without potential judgment, or they’re hiding physical cash somewhere. To create a strong bond with your partner, it’s important to be transparent about your financial standing. Keeping secrets will only fan the flames!

What next?

If you and your partner cannot resolve your money issues, consider relationship counselling. 

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Ava Moore
BA, MA Psychology (and Conflict Resolution), University of Cambridge (2007). With a decade of trial and error in psychology and 33 years of navigating my own complex (that's one word for it!) relationships with family, friends, co-workers and men, I hope I have some useful knowledge and skills to share with my readers about making sense of relationships and trying to become a better person every day.

I'm the Chief Editor here at Independent Femme and would love to hear from you.

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